SIBERIAN MEAT GRINDER

Thrash has always held a grimy little corner in my heart. The first genre that kicked me square in the nuts and put me on the path to Satan and headbanging, (Thanks to Exodus and Testament), so whenever I hear an ignorant as fuck thrash riff come crashing into earshot I always get a big ‘ole grin on my face. So when I find myself getting pummeled into submission by a mixture of crossover thrash, hardcore punk and southern flairs, you can imagine how happy I am with SIBERIAN MEAT GRINDER.

I can’t avoid capslocking that name, you don’t say a name that awesome silently, you howl it at your neighbors while pelting them with broken bottles and old shoes. As you then proceed to tear down their doors, take a piss in the living room, fight with the dog, throw the TV through the window and open up a pit in the dining room. That’s exactly the kind of vibe you get from this group of Russian hooligans.

Pedal-through-the-fucking-floorboards fast, their album “Hail To The Tsar” will leave you flat on your ass in the wake of frantic guitar work, demonic d-beats and murder your grandmother thrash grooves. If thrash was the motor these guys started with, then hardcore bumped the displacement and punk added some boost, cuz this shits rips. Even with a died red thrash core, SMG feel no qualms from venturing into different territories to grab some new flavors.

Gang shouts, campy synth work and fat as hell riffs make this an album hard to stop listening too. There’s no pretense here, they just went out to get the most power out of every second of music and they sure as hell did. Pure joy, start to finish.

So this a 6 track album. The first 5 tracks are what I just described, fucking awesomesauce. The sixth track, now that’s a real humdinger. It’s a cover, of a cartoon theme song and that’s all I’m saying. Other than it’s RAD AS BALLS. SERIOUSLY.

So stop being a pretentious tightwad and go get fucked up for the low cost of $7, ok? Ok? Good.

Siberian Meat Grinder Facebook

Siberian Meat Grinder Bandcamp

Random Riffage: Fat Bottomed Girls

I’ve got this unwritten rule regarding classic rock. I don’t have any physical copies of it (With the exception of CCR, because it’s CCR). I only listen to it on the radio. So this has allowed me to still get stoked on songs that are played quite frequently or are otherwise quite famous. I also have a habit of going on song kicks, where certain grooves just catch me like the plague.

“Fat Bottomed Girls” is just one of those songs that hits all the right chords. That opening harmony, Freddie Freaking Mercury, THAT RIFF, that absolutely floor shattering groove, dat bassline, that guitar tone, that everything.

It’s rock ‘n’ fucking roll, no if’s, and’s or butt’s about it.

A Little Divergence: T Bird and the Breaks

I listen to a wide variety of music, while the majority of it either is napalm spewing guitar violence, or fuzzed out stoner jams there’s still a few genres that give me major musical wood. Funk is one of those such genres. Something about a rump-rattlin’ bassline and oh so glorious horn sections just tickle me right down to my shins. So when I find out there’s a hybrid called chunk which combines funk, rock and hip hop you can be damn well sure I’m jumping on that train.

T Bird and the Breaks are an Austin, Texas based chunk group that have been pumping out records since what looks like 2009. They seem to have garnered a fair amount of (well deserved) attention but this is the first time my ears have been turned in their direction. While I’ll be diving into their back catalog at one point or another, I’ve been focusing on their two most recent releases. “Never Get Out of this Funk Alive” from 2011 and “Dancehall Freakin EP” from March of this year.

Stylistically, the Breaks bounce their away across pretty much every and any genre in their search for good tunes and good times. Fat bottomed basslines, gang vocals, joyous guitar solos, gang vocals, HORNS, harmonicas and a tasteful use of samples and synths. Tracks like “B-B-Burn!” show a more guitar/percussion oriented breed, a funk ‘n’ roll sort of vibe. While “Never Get Out of this Funk Alive” plays out more like a hip hop infused funk track.

The one thing that remains constant through all the tracks is the rock solid vocals provided by T-Bird. From traditional funk to some damn pleasing hip-hop, his voice provides the momentum for the rest of the group to build around. And yes, there are rap songs, but it’s more a early Beasties kind of rap, slick deliveries and great flows. There’s also a generous helping of guest vocalist in the form of either backup signers or as full on duets.

The other constant is the energy. Even on their slower funk trains the songs are stilled packed to the brim with insanely infectious energy. You can tell there’s a lot of passion and a lot of love put into this music. It’s just happy music. Well written, well played and well designed happy go-go joytime music. It almost makes me an optimist. Almost.

I often talk about loving fun music and this is no exception. No expense is spared at making music that is just so fucking joyous you can’t help but dance. And if your not dancing, your writhing around so much in your chair you might as well just get up and shake loose. It’s just that good. I really hope they make a trip to Toronto at some time, as this is one of those things you just want to see live.

All of their albums are up on Bandcamp for damn reasonable prices. So unless your too kvlt to have fun, get yo FUNK ON!

T Bird and the Breaks Facebook

T Bird and the Breaks Bandcamp

Streams for the two albums:

Meandering Musicality with Maize

At times I have to spend hours trawling the deep, dank bowels of the internet in search of the tastiest of jams, like a musical truffle pig searching for the ever illusive riffs. But then sometimes I get lucky and a reader (They exist!?) will leave me a comment pointing towards a previously undiscovered section of the forest. One such reader is Ricardo and one such band is Maize.

This psychedelic trio from Portugal play a blissful combination of classic rock riff worship, epic length meandering jams and spaced out ambiance. Their debut self-titled EP was released a mere five days ago and is 4 tracks and 40 minutes of oh so glorious riffage.

Usually I’m not the biggest psychedelic/space fan, as I usually don’t have the patience to wait through a 3 minute intro and a 10 minute interlude just to hear some music. Maize do a damn fine job of using the spacey elements just as a little added flavor, not as the main course. Probably most comparable to Radio Moscow, with their seemingly effortless jams that slither and twist their way through your conscious.

Essentially an instrumental work, what little vocals there are get used more as punctuation to the paragraphs of guitar. Running the gamut from meaty beer rock riffs, skillfully articulated solos, fuzzed out psychedelics and impenetrable grooves, your never left wanting. The pace changes frequently but smoothly, slipping into each groove for long enough to get comfortable before switching tones to avoid stagnation.

Everything is skillfully played and the production is spot on, with the perfect coating of fuzz to tie everything together. If any word was going to be used to describe their sound, I’d probably slap it with a sublime badge. It’s mellow yet technical, a calm frenzy of guitar, drum and bass work.

This is an extremely promising debut from an extremely promising band. You can pick it up for 2 euro ($2.56) on Bandcamp. Mmmmhmmmm.

Maize Bandcamp

Maize Facebook

Cheap Shot: The Steep Steps

Figure I might as well get another post in while I’m still awake.

“The Steep Steps” is a teaser track from the upcoming release by the punker than thou, The Vibrating Antennas. A dark and rage filled steamroller of noise, grunge and punk, their sound brings to mind such bands as Pigs, Unsane or Whores. Simple, jarring grooves serve as the soap box for the Antennas to vent their frustrations and give them a sonic form.

It’s a punch to the sternum followed by a a quick curb stomping, as you lie on the ground wondering what the hell just hit you. The song opens with a rolling drum intro, fluttering back and forth through your ears. Coarse vocals and a filthy baseline soon join the fun, just in time for one big mother of a riff to leave you in the dust. It’s infectious, violent, dirty, charged up and punk as fuck. Just the way it should be.

There’s no news of any further releases as of now but I hope we can see a full length from these guys in the near future.

The Vibrating Antennas Facebook

The Vibrating Antennas Bandcamp

Twist, Shake and Grind with Low Volts

I have often sang the praises of simple music, music that relies on grooves, riffs and good old fashioned rock ‘n rolling instead of fancy productions or complex instrumental arrangements. The kind of music that can get you on your feet with just a few simple instruments, or in the case of Low Volts, a slide guitar and kick drum.

Low Volts is a one man blues rock band helmed by Tim Lowman of Southern California. Playing in a similar vein to The Dead Guys, Low Volts is a simple distillation of rock and blues, into one potent blend of musical moonshine. The debut album, “Twist, Shake, Grind, Break” was released in May of 2011 and contains 10 tracks of bluesy drawl and one of the tastiest guitar tones I’ve heard in a long time.

Lets start with that tone shall we? As I’m not a musician I can’t tell you anything specific or technical about the setup, playing style or what have you. All I have is the listeners perspective and from this perspective there’s nothing as absolutely ear wetting as a tone so thick you can chew it, slathered with a generous helping of southern molasses just to make it that much sweeter. It’s the kind of tone that rattles windows and wakes babies, twanging and banging it’s way through your brain.

It’s this guitar tone that forms the foundation for this music. It demands your attention, luring you into it’s sultry sweetness. The steady stomp provided by the kick drum is just an accompaniment, something to tap your foot too and keep the groove grounded. From this impenetrable base Low Volts barrages you with a drawling vocal line, soaked in booze, drugs and cigarettes.

From start to finish, “Twist, Shake, Grind, Break” grabs you by the bootstraps and drags you into the swamp, the kind of swamp that even if you wanted to escape from, you probably couldn’t. It’s up for 10 bones on Bandcamp, which is all that separates you from a heaping plate of southern fried blues.

Low Volts Facebook

Low Volts Bandcamp

 

The Cosmic Escape Of Admiral Masuka

I was going to meander out a write up for a cheery blues rock duo, but today is just not that kind of day.

The Battle of Verdun was one of the largest battles fought in World War 1 and also in the history of warfare. A battle that raged for the better part of a year and resulted in somewhere around 800,000 confirmed casualties. It’s one of many examples that show humanity is really quite good at killing itself. Named after such a gruesome battle, one could only expect a band to give sonic life to the destruction, darkness and agony of that time in history. Verdun does and then some.

This Montpellier, France based quintet deliver a crushing landslide of pulverizing basslines, droned out riffs and howling screams all wrapped in the itchy wool blanket of despair. A combination of equal parts violence, doom, sludge and hardcore, their 3 track EP, “The Cosmic Escape of Admiral Masuka” is unrelenting in it’s pursuit of your eventual oblivion.

Even with three tracks the EP still clocks in at close to 30 minutes, so each song is well within or skirting the edge of epic territory. The songs drag you further and further into a state of perpetual headbang, with foul grooves as the propellant. While the song structure and tone show the doom/sludge influences, the riffs incorporate elements of hardcore, just stretched out and tortured, instead of hammered directly into your skull.

The last track, “Jaxa” is the standout in my mind. Everything that they had building to in the previous songs finally culminates in an epic amalgamation of genres. The droned out pace is punctured by jolts of space-like ambiance, foul moans and distorted screams. A bluesy guitar solo struggles for breathing room as the sludge ever so slowly covers it in oozing black evil.

Yeah, it’s that good.

This isn’t happy music. It’s angry, vile and a harbinger of doom. There is a certain majesty to the whole affair, in a monolithic sort of way. “The Cosmic Escape Of Admiral Masuka” is up for 2 euro ($2.60), which is a steal for such an excellent doom/hardcore hybrid. Go forth and conquer.

Verdun Bandcamp

Verdun Facebook